Fear and uncertainty, life's biggest bitches. And somehow, *ding ding ding* they've decided to drop by for a friendly visit. Fear, uncertainty, insecurity, sadness, the whole shebang. They hit you when you least expect, and when they hit, they hit hard as hell. And even if you did expect it, well, that does nothing to soften the blow.

My life was a hell of a downhill ride today, maybe more than it should be. Yeah, there were ups, oh definitely there were ups, but the downs were pretty steep, and that really made it so I easily trip and fall.

Falling is not the hard part. It's picking myself up that's the clincher. I'm afraid, I'm uncertain, I'm insecure, I'm unprepared. Worst part is, this will probably affect my life, from now till then. Which would really be horrible. Yeah, I know, I shouldn't dwell on this, since it will only serve to spoil what little time I have left. But...

I really don't know if I can do this.




*I have a shitload of stuff I'd love to put up, but I can't seem to put them into words. Plus my keyboard is wonky tonight, since I had to wipe off some water from it. Ah, the life of a sentimental, emotional, 19 year old sap of a boy.